A Desperate Cry to God

Good morning, Beloved of God,

I’m sorry if I come across too flippant over these trials. I know for a fact that we have all been in that place where we cry out, ‘C’mon God, just kill me!’ Even the mighty men of God reached that point at times.

But he [Elijah] himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree. Then he requested for himself that he might die, and said, “It is enough. Now, O Yahweh, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers.” 1Kings 19:4 WEB (Emphasis added)

There is no sin in this. There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Thankfully, we don’t all hit that point of exhaustion at the same time. We cry out with you and for you in your despair, and look to the Lord for your deliverance. Lord, you know our limits and our limitations. You know how weak we are. We ourselves bring nothing to the table except that we believe you. We believe your word and your promises. Glorify Yourself in this!

We are in humble clay vessels, fashioned for your service. What would you have us do? Lord, we need an answer, we need your leading. We cling to the Blessed Hope, to the victory that you have already won for us. We believe we are walking the paths that you have ordained for us to walk on, and in those good works that you created for us to walk in. We look to you today for rest, sustenance and encouragement. And, if it is your will, we look to you for healing. Or, even better, take us Home today!

The deals with God of those members of our fellowship who have fallen asleep, including your daughter Katy, were their deals with God. They walked the paths that He chose for them, and they will be rewarded at the Bema seat. I have said before that I believe we have a certain amount of choice in deciding what we can endure. Paul himself debated with himself as to whether he would remain in the body, or go Home to be with the Lord. Eventually, even he went home.

No one else can make that decision for us, and regardless of what decision we make, we go Home in victory! We rest in the knowledge that we have served God.

The one point I disagree with you on is Satan’s ability to hit at us in spite of the will of God. To accept that denies the promises in Psalms 91 and excludes you from the promise that all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.  Do these words have no meaning in your life?

“Because he has set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he has known my name.

He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honor him.

With long life will I satisfy him, and show him my salvation.” Psalm 91:14-16 WEB

I don’t see an ‘except when the enemy decides to take a whack at you or stick you in a fiery furnace’ clause in that anywhere.

Failing to rejoice when faced with a trial is like me breaking down and calling some other driver an idiot when they provoke me. I consider it a misdemeanor. We cannot fix ourselves, and our behavior is just an indicator of how far along the work of the Holy Spirit is in us. It is a manifestation of our flesh, and how much victory over it that we currently walk in. We fail, but Jesus never fails. It is the Holy Spirit’s job to complete the work of sanctification in us. We have nothing to prove.

When we see something good in ourselves, we thank God for it. It is fruit of the Spirit.

Thank you for sharing the depths of the despair that you are feeling. You cannot offend me and I deeply apologize if I have offended you. One of the most encouraging maxims I employ when faced with a trial is one of yours that has become a favorite of mine: ‘Things are never so bad that they can’t get worse.’ To me, it’s an amusing way of saying ‘count your blessings and thank God for what you have.’ Another favorite comes from the Psalms, ‘let the bones that you have broken rejoice.’ Psalm 51:8

God will bring you through this. He will bring all of us through this together.

Here are a couple pictures of the trail to the top that I am building:

A tree in the middle of a forest

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This first one looks East, back toward the round pen terrace I built last summer. I’m probably only about half-way to the top so far. Clancy from Equipment Rescue is coming next week to fix the tractor, which probably has a clogged fuel filter.

A tree in the middle of a forest

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This one looks West, from the edge of the round pen terrace. This is where the trail begins. I will finish it if we’re still here, but the way things are progressing, I think our time here is about up, and I do mean up.

God bless you all today. Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you. Rest in the Lord.  I love you,   Jerry

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Photo Credits

  • Adapted from #91237724/Jankovoy-adobe stock.com
  • Moose Creek Ranch trail east by Jerry Bartholomew
  • Moose Creek Ranch trail west by Jerry Bartholomew
  • Don’t Mess With Israel by Greg Lauer @alittlestrength.com